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Flat Stomach Food

“Mom, don’t eat all my Halloween candy today, okay?”  These words were delivered to me by my then three year old son Zeke. He looked me right in the eye, hand on my arm, and sweetly asked me not to devour the candy he gathered the night before.

My first thoughts were ugly. I admit it. I wanted to say “Of Course I won’t eat your candy Child!” full of indignation and shock.  I wanted to say “Zeke, I am an adult, if I want a piece of that precious candy, I will take it!” 

Instead, I said “Okay Son, I promise to stay out of your candy.", grieved down to my bones.  Stunned as well, since he had to ask me not to eat his candy at the exact moment I was looking forward to eating it all up. (Holy Spirit, anyone?)  After he was deposited into his preschool class, I went straight home and cried. That ugly kind of crying we do when we are brokenhearted.  Wailing, sobbing, shaking, and gagging on our words, crying that is flat out scary to observe.  

While wallowing on the floor despising myself I realized that my “secret” wasn’t really a secret to anyone. My child, who had only walked this earth 3.5 years, could see Mom has a problem. 

I felt so exposed, so ugly and sinful, shamed by my actions and desires.  Agonizingly  alone.  It is horribly embarrassing to admit you can’t walk by a plate of food without lusting. You can’t stay out of your three year olds Halloween candy by your own willpower.  That sometimes, when everyone else is asleep, you get up and eat. Hurriedly devouring an astounding amount of food, until your stomach aches, without even enjoying what you have just consumed.  It’s all so embarrassingly painful to admit, even when you’re rolling around on the living room floor having an emotional breakdown in broad daylight.

I began to acknowledge for the first time, my actions were hurting everyone. Not just me.  I wanted to think that because my children didn’t have a weight problem, I had protected them from the demon I was fighting.  I wanted so desperately to declare them untouched by my struggles.  As a mother, you want nothing more than to protect your babies from the darkness, especially when you battle that darkness every day.  This was the noble aspect of my denial, if you will.

But there was also a deeper, more sinister aspect for me.  If my children, were unscathed by my problem, then in some way it was “okay” to continue.  As though, it was acceptable to live this way, as long as no one but me was getting hurt. I believe that behavior is known as rationalizing. (A destination I still find myself camped at, quite often.)   

Now, I wish I could wrap up this post in a nice pretty package for you, because that’s how I am.  I would love to say “So I got up off the floor, gave my problem to God indefinitely and now I am cured! Halleluiah!”

I would never lie to you, like that.

Instead, I will tell you the truth about that day, and those to come. It would be the first of many moments of pain and clarity. The beginning of years of wrestling with God over the struggle I at once want to be free of and also cling to in an emergency.  

So, where I am now? Well, not relentlessly wallowing on the Halloween Candy Floor of Shame, for sure. Neither am I in a place where I would say “Healed”.

 I am in that middle place that Angie talks about so eloquently. Wallowing now in God’s grace and love for me.  Savoring the gift of community and knowledge that I am not alone in the ups and downs of my journey, and neither are you.    

The reason for our physical distention, and why our mental and emotional attention gets so focused on our belly is because there is just so much going on in there!  Bloating is an outward symptom of our food not being properly digested. The gastric and digestive juices are being kicked into overdrive, indicating that something is not digesting optimally- to put it lightly.  Which brings us to our 2 Easiest Ways to Keep Bloat Down and prevent bloating in the first place. I think you'll be psyched to see how simple they are, and that yes you can do this!! You can indeed prevent a good deal of bloat from occurring.

The first is to consume as little liquids and drinks as possible while eating. It might seem intuitive to "fill up" with water while eating, so you don't overeat. I used to think the same thing. But the truth is that consuming a large amount of liquids while eating will dilute the hydrochloric acid and other gastric juices in our stomach. When this happens our digestion gets impeded, we waste a ton of energy, and yes, we bloat out! I generally recommend to my clients that they drink water and other liquids in significant quantities 30 minutes before meals so you go into your meal already hydrated. If you are having a glass of wine at dinner, try to drink a good portion of it before the food comes- without downing it of course! Cleverly try to spread out the time between ordering the wine and your food. Sure it is okay to sip water as you need to at the meal. Just keep in mind our little rule, which is that More Liquid= More Bloat at meals. Sip not chug!

The second easy tip has to do with fruit. Fruits, precious foods filled with vitamins and minerals, turn into deadly bloating foods when eaten with or after cooked food. Why? Consider this: Fruits are mostly water, and actually break down and leave the stomach in 20-30 minutes. Other heavier foods take a few hours to break down in the stomach, depending on what the food is. If the fruit is eaten over and on top of the heavier foods, it will break down and then have nowhere to go. Kind of like a traffic jam. And so what does the fruit do? Well with nowhere to go, the fruit starts fermenting, acidifying and releasing gases along the way. And what does that mean for us? You guessed it- bloat!

The first time I said this publicly was on Good Morning America. Millions of people watched the show, and dozens of people wrote to me afterwards, fascinated to know more about how to properly eat fruit. The general rule is this: Eat fruit in the morning as the first thing at breakfast or as the whole breakfast, or about half an hour before cooked food. That way, the fruit can pass through first and not cause the dreaded bloating traffic jam in our bellies!

Give these two easy tips a try- they can be used as potent weapons for you in your battle to stay flat-bellied, this holiday season and forever! You are going to feel and look fabulous in your little dresses, and be able to focus your mind on having fun... and off a bloated belly.

All my very best, Kimberly